I did it anyway, my lessons in Judgement House 2013

When was the last time you did something you were afraid of doing?  Have you ever had a little voice in your head coaxing you to go forward with something, and you actually had an argument with it on why you should absolutely NOT do it?

It seems to be my life lately as I push myself to the edge of my comfort level, but luckily having some life learning results.

image: Pinterest

The past 6 months have been a personal growth period for me where I have focused less on the past and more on the present. My anxiety levels have just dropped to almost nothing as I worry less about tomorrow and place my hope and plans in the hands of my awesome creator. This time of year always seems to be hectic for my family as school starting launches 3 birthdays in my family, which lead to our church's Judgement House, which falls right into the Holidays. If you have followed my page for a while I have shared some about Judgement House in the past, (read it here), and it is such a rich time of personal and spiritual growth for me personally.  This year had me feeling a tad bit apprehensive going in to it. Last year, it was getting out of my comfort zone and playing a speaking role. This year, due to the script, there was not a speaking role available for me, so instead I was placed into a sort of leadership role as a co-director to a scene full of, are you ready? - Teenagers!!!! (gasp!) Yeah, like 15-18 teenagers.  All at one time.
Oh I tried to talk myself out of it.

"I don't know how to handle teenagers." This kept repeating through my brain.  (Note my oldest daughter just turned 13 at the beginning of the month, so I really have no experience with this yet, other than my own personal experience as a teenager.)  My world is full of toddlers and a 5 year old boy.

"I'm just too tired."  From toddlers and a 5 year old boy.  "Maybe I will just skip this year."


This is where the big lesson comes in.  If you've followed me this far, keep with me.

We live in a world of comfort, don't we?  Especially in our country we are dependent on convenience, fast, and the what's in it for ME mentality.  I don't like to be "uncomfortable" any more than you do.  Why would I want to subject myself to something that might frustrate, or confuse or make me actually have learn something?

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Here's the thing.  God our creator, has a plan for each of us.  (Jeremiah 29:11) A book almost of our life. (Psalm 139:16) In it is our beginning, our end and our days in between.  I happen to think that God does speak to us, through the holy spirit,(2 Samuel 23:2)  to guide us and give us direction towards His plan for us. If you don't think you've heard it, you probably just aren't listening.

So I went ahead, and went to rehearsal.  It was good, but maybe I can still get out of it.  Then there was dress rehearsal night.  Our Director ended up sick and that meant it was ME in charge of all these teens and the scene. Yikes!  Now I had no choice.  I HAD to do it.
Details aside, I can't imagine missing out on a moment of this experience. I have seen a bit of myself in each one of these teens, and hearing their stories, seeing their tears, listening to the realities of their world. I can't help but think that my entire life has prepared me for these moments the past two weeks.

God uses your hurt.  He takes the bad, the mistakes, the pain, and turns them into blankets of blessings for others. (Romans 8:28) We confess our sins to be right with God, but we share our sins with others to heal our hearts. And in the process heal others. (James 5:16)

Fear is our greatest hindrance in having the life that God planned for us.  Listen to that voice within, and don't argue, just go forward, in full faith that maybe this is your heavenly Father showing you the way.

Find out more about Newspring Church's "Judgement House" production here.